April Showers

The Venus Fly Trap was originally known, more simply, as The Fly Trap. But following financial hardship in the early 1990s The Fly Trap was forced to secure a lucrative sponsorship deal with Venus, the lady shaving company. Although the sponsorship deal finished in 2004, the name remains very much a part of popular culture.

The J.K. in “popular” author J.K. Rowling’s name actually stands for “Jokes”. This is of course part of her elaborate plan, making fully-grown adults with actual brains enjoy a child’s storybook about a wizard.

Until the 1970s, Rowntree’s Fruit Pastilles never had black fruit pastilles in their packets. They were segregated and could only be brought on the black market. This is sometimes seen as surprising, given Rowntree’s preponderance for a progressive social policy for all employees.

Due to rising unemployment and saturated levels of admissions, a university degree is no longer worth the paper it is written on; unless, of course, you go to one of them good universities, and do one of them real degrees.

Clothes Shop Mannequins have incredibly poignant nipples as to indulge the often sexually deviate Customer Services Assistants.

Vertical stripes make you look thinner (only if you are thin).

Hair was made compulsory in Nazi Germany, after an all too frequent disagreement between Hitler and Mussolini. This time the altercation came when they decided to play a board game. The game was chess: neither wanted to be black.

Pigeons only learned how to fly, following an influx of immigrant rats in the 1950s.

Popular nu-folk quartet, Mumford & Sons, ironically do not contain any father/son bonds; yet the same is seen as somewhat ironic as none of the ‘Mumfords’ or the ‘Sons’ like the Sun very much. This is likewise ironic given their taste for farming clothes. (Disclaimer: I’m not sure what irony is.)

Before the remote control was invented, people had to watch whatever television channel was tuned first. New research has shown those stuck on ITV1 had a greater likelihood of suffering from mental illness.

Happy April Fools’ Day!




TSL - 01/04/2012